Suicide Awareness

It’s Still July

Not even two weeks into July…

I’m not taking this month too well. Every morning is hard. Every night is equally difficult. Even Mia is acting strange. I would say I can’t explain it but oh I sure can.

The scattered showers are a repeat of a year ago. The thunder scares Mia. I couldn’t find her the other day any where in the house and I knew she wasn’t outside. I went to the bathroom and heard something in the shower. I slowly moved the curtain back…there she was all comfy in the tub. Now I know where to look. She has been on edge.

Scrolling through fb, I read my highschool band director’s post about his daughter’s wedding. I teared up. They left two chairs open with roses on them in the family row for ones who have passed on. That was one of the sweetest things I’ve seen. Cherish the ones who are no longer here, because if they made some sort of impact in your life, they deserve to be honored.

Another touchy subject. Please forgive me for bringing this up but it’s my blog 🤗. When one says “I’ll pray for you” do they really mean it? Yes, I truly believe a few. Definitely. In fact I can name the ones I KNOW for SURE pray for me when they say they do. Not only are they strong Christians, they’re genuine and know how to love. While I’m saying it, I know you were probably thinking it…

Sunday we got more bad news. Kaleb, one of the boys, lost his mom. He came over Tuesday (along with several of the other boys) to see us but I don’t think it’s hit him yet. In less than a year Kaleb has lost his best friend and his mom. *sigh*

I usually blog more often so sorry this one was stretched out. Honestly? I’ve been too angry to blog. I have found that when I’m really upset that I say things I shouldn’t so instead I let it out at the gym. My gym buddies make me laugh. Why so angry? Well that’s easy.

For the last year I’ve said Facebook memories were a lifesaver. Yesterday as I scrolled through mine it hit me. Those pictures were taken TWO years ago because of Zeagan’s age. 2. I instantly got sick.

He’s been gone almost a year.

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