Suicide Awareness

It’s All I Have

Almost 8 months and things will still never be the same. So much has changed. I'm not the same person. I kinda don't like who I am. But I can't be the old me. The old me died 239 days ago. As I was shampooing a client's hair this morning another flashback came to me.… Continue reading It’s All I Have

Suicide Awareness

It’s Not Easy Being Me

Superman. Who is your Superman? Who is your Batman? Who is your superhero? Superman (It's Not Easy) by Five For Fighting I can't stand to fly I'm not that naive I'm just out to find The better part of me I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane I'm more than some pretty… Continue reading It’s Not Easy Being Me

Suicide Awareness

Cookies Anyone?

I've shared this story before but it's such a funny one I have to repeat it. That's why the cover photo is the text conversation between Zane and I...it makes me laugh every time I read it. Very nostalgic. As usual, multiple boys at the house + frozen cookie dough + a microwave = a… Continue reading Cookies Anyone?

Suicide Awareness

Fearful and Wonderful

"I am fearfully and wonderfully made." ~ Psalm 139:14 My son was fearfully and wonderfully made. I just wish he was still here to be fearful and wonderful with us. I am jealous of how strong he was, all the way to the end. He was never weak, not at any moment. Flashbacks suck. I… Continue reading Fearful and Wonderful

Suicide Awareness

Seven Months & Our Beds Are Still Burning

How do we sleep when our beds are burning... One of my favorite songs from the 80s. But now it has a meaning. My bed is burning. I still can hardly sleep soundly. But I wish every night Zane would walk in my dreams, if I even dream at all. I haven't seen him in… Continue reading Seven Months & Our Beds Are Still Burning

Suicide Awareness

Love Remains The Same

"A thousand times I've seen you standing Gravity like lunar landing You make me wanna run till I find you I shut the world away from here Drift to you, you're all I hear As everything we know fades to black Half the time the world is ending Truth is I am done pretending I,… Continue reading Love Remains The Same

Suicide Awareness

33.57°N 102.38°E

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end." ~ John Lennon A friend posted this on FB the other day. I told her I can only 'imagine' Zane thought it was okay in the end. My sweet baby boy was ok. But what about the innocent people in… Continue reading 33.57°N 102.38°E